So I went to watch The Town, the new Ben Affleck directed cops-and-robbers thriller. Unlike his feature film directorial debut "Gone baby, gone" (which I liked quite a bit), Ben put himself in front of the camera this time and decided to teach me some valuable lessons:
- BEN AFFLECK IS FROM BOSTON!
- Pouring bleach on some stuff erases every single shred of evidence from a crime scene
- Bank managers are hot
- Chris Cooper should have been in it more
- FBI car antennas are located 2/3's of the way up on the rear window (and everyone in Charlestown knows this)
- Silas from Deadwood is a cop
- BEN AFFLECK IS FROM BOSTON!
- Pete Postlethwaithe's nose gets weirder for each movie
- Criminal geniuses are actually pretty stupid
- Jem isn't a good name for anyone
- Drinking soda from a discarded cup is alright if you are dying
- BEN AFFLECK IS FROM BOSTON!
- If you are a crime boss threatening people's lives, you should have a better bodyguard than a fat, aging bald dude
- Talking about death and abandonment on dates is cool
- Flashbangs make things go in slow motion
- And finally: ...BEN AFFLECK IS FROM BOSTON!
Leave a comment below if you learned anything else from this terrible film.
No comments:
Post a Comment